1. It was originally penned on April 1. (APRIL. FIRST.)
2. And if April 1 does nothing to jog your brain, you should definitely click the link at the bottom.
Okay, carry on.]
If you’re a regular reader, you know I spend somewhere around 126% of the time talking about all things guest services…particularly as they pertain to the local church…and even more particularly how they pertain to the church where I serve.
One of the components of our guest services team is what we call our First Time Guest (FTG) Tent: an area where FTGs can drop by on their way into the building for the first time to meet some people, get a personalized tour, and receive a gift for coming.
Today, I’m excited to announce something special we’re doing for the month of April. While we always give away a simple gift bag, I discovered we’re more than halfway through our budget year and – surprisingly – I have a good chunk of change left. So in the words of that great theologian Emeril Lagasse, we’re going to kick things up a notch.
For the next four weekends, we’re going to include special “bonus gifts” in over 100 FTG bags. Are you ready for this? We’re giving away a half dozen Keurig coffee makers, 15 Target gift cards ranging from $10 to $50, iPod Shuffles, GPS units, Summit t-shirts, Pastor J.D.’s books, gas cards…there’s even a rumor there might be an iPad in the mix.
That’s right. These are a few of my favorite things, and we’re going to Oprahfy this joint.
But the gifts won’t just be of the take-home variety. Not at all. A few lucky guests will get their cars washed, waxed and detailed while they’re in the service. And while nobody can be a First Time Guest more than once, one FTG will get what is certain to be a coveted prize…a First Time Guest parking spot for an entire year. That’s right: you’ll park in a premium spot right in front of the main entrance for 52 weekends in a row. Boomsauce.
“But wait!” you say. “What about those of us who have faithfully attended for years?” That’s the great news. Because one out of every four Summit attendees who bring a FTG will get a matching gift. They get a Keurig, you get a Keurig. They get a gas card, you get one too. It’s a win win.
We want our guests to know how happy we are to have them visit, and we believe that the gospel dictates generosity. Big generosity. GINORMOUS generosity. Much larger churches treat guests to Jonas Brothers concerts or even give away new cars. We obviously can’t go that far, but I believe these are entirely appropriate ways to get our guests to stick around for a second visit. And that’s what it’s all about.
For a complete list of the gifts (as well as the “fine print” on how we’ll screen to make sure they’re actually FTGs), click here.
Start inviting!
April 1, 2013 at 7:13 am
Well I never got one back in the day. And neither did my better half. So we are going to invite each other in hopes to win. Maybe we can get matching gifts. We really need 2 Keurig’s and 2 iPads. Work your magic.
April 1, 2013 at 7:14 am
I want to attend when FTG’s get a puppy.
April 1, 2013 at 8:22 am
I love that you an an April fool!!! :)
April 1, 2013 at 10:27 am
[…] women on the planet. These were the ‘Mother’ of all gift bags (I don’t care what Danny Franks says). We put them all over our entrances so guests could receive one on their way out. In all but one […]
April 1, 2013 at 10:29 am
…I hate April Fool’s.
April 1, 2013 at 12:12 pm
I LOVE April 1 because of Danny Franks! This was fantastic. With Easter being yesterday, I completely forgot about your posts and was expecting something statisticy and non-funny. What a pleasant surprise! Also, I completely agree that FTGs should get a puppy. Let’s do a pilot program on Sat nights first.
April 2, 2013 at 7:03 am
[…] Yesterday I celebrated the fifth April 1st on the blog. That’s right. In case you have the spiritual gift of gullibility, you were the victim of the annual Connective Tissue April Fools’ prank. (Seriously, people. You really should click the link at the bottom of the post.) Contrary to what you read, there are no plans to upgrade our First Time Guest bags. Keurig machines? Come on. Car washes while you wait? Not likely. […]
April 4, 2013 at 7:01 am
[…] not to believe anything they read the next day…especially on this blog. Death, taxes, and the annual April Fools post: they’re all inevitable, and amazingly, they all catch people off […]
April 10, 2013 at 12:01 pm
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April 2, 2014 at 8:31 am
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April 17, 2014 at 9:16 am
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July 29, 2014 at 3:54 pm
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